Cuban Catholic Agents (Gori, Georgia)

Opposed National Causes:

Tanacharison: The Hanseatic League.

John Wilkes Booth: The Monarchy of Spain.

Albert Whisker: The Irish Republic.

Lee Harvey Oswald: Gulda Meir.

Martin Luther King Jr.: The Baptist Church.

Sirhan Sirhan: The Murdoch Fox Combine.

George Jung: The Fraternal Order of the Police.

OJ Simpson: The Olympics Committee.

David Charlebois: The House of Tudor.

Refusals of Contract (The Trifecta):

Tanacharison: Jumonville. Hatchet

John Wilkes Booth: Abraham Lincoln. Pornstar holdout pistol.

Albert Whisker: Detective Joseph Kennedy. Tarantula in outhouse.

Lee Harvey Oswald: President John Oakley III. Crack-cocaine cigarette.

Martin Luther King Jr.: Martha Spaulding. Candied yams.

Sirhan Sirhan: Robert F. Kennedy. Close loaded revolver, double dual creme pie, and a heartbroken kid (Spider-Man, the eulogy).

George Jung: Escardo Noufez. Colombian neck trap (lock hold to arm then throw to floor, 'the penguin').

OJ Simpson: Johnathan Simpson. Track coach dempsey salute, abortion.

David Charlebois: Queen Elizabeth II of Tudor. Chess blunder into victory, "From Russia With Love", and Kate Middleton.

Assassin Recipes (Legendary Contributions):

Tanacharison: The filterless cigarette, a Lucky Strike, enjoyed with a gin martini. Two shots of gin, fill with seltzer, and enjoy a Lucky Strike on a brass lighter, a zippo. For VC nai poon. That's the lady. He always knew where the next war would be.

John Wilkes Booth: Take the Snake, a prison rapist, and the Loser, a bisexual informant, and switch them, with a peanut butter sandwich, Skippy, no jelly, bleached bread, Wonderbread, in high sun, with a Marlboro Red at the same time; remark, "flavor country", to the Snake, your mind's eye of the Loser. The club goes all the way back home, and there's a witch trial, on slavery.

Albert Whisker: Use a three pointer, a 3.5 shot glass, the Cantonese shot, to take a half shotter of vodka, cheap stuff, and a half shotter of orange juice, expensive, campus variety, and hammer a shot, before you snort amphetamines. That's the stuff, to get you going, to understand Chinese history. It doesn't go away, unless you've seen Disturbed in concert. Back in that day, we called him Bojangles; or maybe Scott Joplin, or Sammy Davis Junior.

Lee Harvey Oswald: Get a Marlboro Red, some nitrate car battery stomped coca (cocaine powder on cut, "pure", a CIA blend, nitrate phosphate, for the erection, or the transgender juices, if you prefer the ladies, for the ladies), and take a Bazooka Joe pellet. Demonstrate the technique, to the target, "the head crab", someone stealing a drug dealer's job to lay you, as a Freemasonic Ring (Mister President), to dab the powder from the gum, on the cigarette, then smoke it backwards, on the filter (I'm just a paddy, a poor Irish sailor). They'll need crack rock to get out, but only if they trust Jack "Hardy" Ruby, Charlie Manson (old Mister Lincoln, "he stinks", then you're shut down, the entire campus; you wrote 'nigger' in the bathroom, Lincoln was a drug dealer this time, 'again').

Martin Luther King Jr.: Order a beef tarte, the cheeseburger empanada, from anything labeled 'King', and if they have the tres luches, you've alerted them that "James Earl Ray", is in the area. A personal delivery, will be made to a black Senator's house, to see if you've received a coin, from the Nordic Lodge, the rival to the Lounge, the old athlete's singing joint. If it's Joe Frazier's Lounge, you win; you've just caught the last show to Delaware, Joe Biden is President. Like the King family wanted, a French President, since 1935 (improved traffic resistance, the last place besides the bus they can't get you; the King family, is the cops, they run the restaurant).

Sirhan Sirhan: If you have a charcoal grill, strike up a conversation, with a man with your feet. If he's a propane man, that doesn't know how to cook, he'll have your exact stumble, having studied you, to build a healthy intestine. Your mother, will retain cooking recipes, for his family's secrets, on cartoon anti-Semitism, a fat man, for the proper distribution of diet on a budget; for all involved, including you, the stock of frozen foods non-necessary to eat, to get you "off the bucket", and into proper ordering, fifteen dollars on a two dollar "squib", the fees and tip, on a twenty dollar meal, with an extra meal left over, for a three day "spree".

George Jung: "Boston" George Jung, wants you to know, that it is inappropriate, to drink whiskey, without Worcestershire sauce, hiding the steak's sauce, with a Bloody Mary. To beat AA protocols, mix the Worcestershire, in your home "furnace", the cabinet, with Jim Beam, the preferred whiskey of the CIA range division, the overweight cop. If you know a cop, who has ever been overweight, and he doesn't know he's a cop, give him a flask of Jim Beam (not a "fifth", the jeopardy round, you've just qualified as airman, you get free LSD). He'll figure everything out. But he's watching you, very closely, because your girlfriend, likes them big; you're listening to Boston George.

OJ Simpson: The bowels can be purged, through a heart seizure, a rare term of logic, invented by Jake Charlebois, at Minnesota State University, on the professional college team. The posture as Hitler, as an American quarterback aside, a bowl of whole milk, a full box of Cheerios, and a Friendly's Sundae, in the tin (now a plastic or paper cup, since the advance by OJ), can be used; eating the entire box and all the milk, then the peanut butter Friendly's Sundae, to seize the heart clamps, before the pain and agony passes, and a Marlboro Red is enjoyed, OJ's choice to retire from football to get his Wheaties Box (the first of its kind). The bowel chlonic, will unblock the hemorrhages in the liver, unless you die; you were eating too much mayonnaise (you worked food services, and are in danger of colon surgery; sorry, kid, not for the big leagues, bagging groceries).

David Charlebois: A Chinese sausage, can be enjoyed on a George Foreman grill; normally lethal, "red sausage", unless on charcoal, an easy cause of trichinosis, unless rigid cooking times are observed; impossible for the mentally ill. The press grill, however, guarantees a succulent taste, and a slow purge of the insides, the sweatest black meat you can afford. Any sausage, is delicious on a Foreman, but not like red sausage, the Chinese sausage; a boneless spare rib, lethal to Jews out of paranoia, but just delicate enough to please a Hebrew man's stomach if char broiled in a press machine. Be aware, if your room mate has the Foreman, and won't eat it, he's a traitor. Take his story of his background, and recommend it to a writer claiming Lutheran, as marked '88', Millard Fillmore; a history teacher, in politics.

Initiation Spots (Early Puberty):

Tanacharison: The identification of agents pressing fraud, as corporal surgeons claiming police license; hence identifying police, as medical agent. (Assassin's Creed)

Booth: The identification, of those attempting quotient of test, to place in care of wealthy, as poor, based upon intent of act necessitating psychiatric barrister; none given of purpose of test. (Quake)

Whisker: The difference viewed, between Irish as king, and Irish as Slav, however, sent from Britain, after offense to Jew; winning battle against Breton or British, not through honest asylum in English isle. (Resident Evil)

Oswald: The creation of a brand as necessary to steal, hence the application of loser, test already viewed, alcoholic, boycott already in family, and wash, removed from history as fictional character, viewed through eyes of Swede. (Doom)

King: The notice of management, as slave, hence any consumer, was leadership, in terms of positive response to firm, the further pressure of promotion, hence family, as trap at low income job, with promotion through proper work at academics, at upwards utility of age, not trap of prison inmate having failed same such test. (Super Mario Brothers)

Sirhan: The notice of police officer arresting self, having frauded self at own order through bank teller; through view of local programming news, held secret at false documentary, influenced through Jesuit of order, hence news was false in reversed report of import, to program subject matter labeled to control recruit of police in locality of political mayor's logic. (Pac-Man)

Jung: The notification of score of track, athletics, as unknown for police officer qualification, hence placement in arms dealership, as cartoon, by other arms dealer, labeled as Canadian Mounted; rather an uniform service, but uniform as name of wearing, actually a standard police federal, rather than a secret office name of state, controlled by own uniform officers as being the oversight byzantine of orchestrated force below. (Burger Man)

Simpson: The scholarship as necassery to pass, not to win, hence any placement of logo, is endorsement, admission of tantamont guilt of state; any such rig, a support of collector's item, the lowest admission of achievement, hence management over monetized sum collected of single in billions, but through tens of thousands, extended through abstract of economy, hence all sum of college, worthless, given athletic achievement in film or notoriety, through label on children's product. (Wolfenstein)

Charlebois: The view of circus, as draft of innocent, to serve convict, through notice of demographic upon software as essential, as test of compliance; therefore, any system of limited rapport, is not for open data, but rather for lack of mirth, the intelligence infrastructure to destroy a politician, through loss of life, through word applied, in ancient antiquity, creating an evil, through language applied to dictionary, removed upon consolidate, in common word of rumor, the high castled ivory tower of artistic claim to control poor through readership, not actual ability; therefore, ability of poor impossible, all art to be ignored in favor of finance; control of own family. (Halo)

Cuban Catholic Demises (Matched by Gay Men):

Tanacharison: Pneumonia, from having cigarette spiked with opium, by Ben Franklin, while on mission to Boston. Ben sought Tanacharison's child, for the "Poor Richard's Almanac". Crops down for ten years, shutdown of French shipping of wines in Pennsylvania harbors.

John Wilkes Booth: Offended that Resource Economics, his invention to save the African people in the event of secession, had been misused by Mary Todd Lincoln. Got the other Lincoln, Abraham, instead. Appeared in pornography, unaware of incest signs in children. Lincoln was a giant, barren. John Wilkes Booth lives in, in the Lincolns, and their cousins from Canada, such as O'Neill musician, "Mace".

Albert Whisker: Heart attack, after witnessing the son/daughter of Baronet Gil Valentin, James Marcus, kill his son at live round, for refusing to climb onto a spinning playground wheel full of deer carcasses and masturbate, with black dominatrixes and their children watching. Albert Whisker's son, Cockney, had offended James Marcus, by using the outhouse all night, covered with bees, afraid of a tarantula in the toilet.

Lee Harvey Oswald: Shot by Clan Evil expatriate, Jack "Ruby" Hardy, to cover up the existence of the crack cocaine cigarette's cure, crack rock, invented by Clan Evil, the founding family of the CIA. Dr. Pepper, returned to the Oswalds, by the father of Helmut Kohl, for influence in Israel, emboldened by a rumor of a tank deal in Germany, placed in the 1920s, by enterprising Kurds, hoping for business deals with the promised Jewish Haganah.

Martin Luther King Jr.: Discovered that Jesse Jackson, had been defecating on his wife, not as a joke. Horrified, Al Sharpton called a firefighter, and had James Earl Ray sprung out of prison, to shoot King from a fireman's carry, before reincarcerating him. Martin Luther King Jr., was lured out onto the balcony, by Al Sharpton jumping hyperactively, revealing himself as the other politician in King's unit, King also jumping. King never realized in fatality, that Loretta Scott King, didn't jump. Jesse Jackson's secret, of gymnast wives, never escaped. Dead men tell no tales.

Sirhan Sirhan: Released from prison, good job.

George Jung: Died with cop badge and full honors as Canadian Mounted, suppressed by AA/NA, a drug dealers union out of police quarters, due to film "Blow" making more money than expected at box office. John Travolta, displeased, that Gotti was a rental success, hiding its success in theaters, from preview showing; advised by id Software operator, "B-Rock".

OJ Simpson: Saved from homelessness by enterprising Chas T. Main junior operative, David Michael Charlebois, through print of "The Dark Knight", actor's bit written for gesture tell, "Hideous Karl"; "I Know What You Did Last Summer, Because I Did It". Heath Ledger earns his angel wings (got bribed with twins threeway to make the film, always lethal).

David Charlebois: Father controls bank account, due to hooker addiction, of his own creation, in several manners of thinking. Future, unknown.